we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
