When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Duck Duck Cougar?
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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