This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Randomize
