Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
