Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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