we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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