Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
