dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize