i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
