I just made out with a guy for $7.
her vagine was all disorganized.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
You have to summon your inner elephant
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
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