so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
I use my feet as sexual weapons
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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