never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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