Duck Duck Cougar?
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
We have started to decorate penises.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Nobody cheats on THIS.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
