I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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