i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Randomize
