Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
