with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
