he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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