And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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