So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
