i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Randomize
