Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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