I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize