And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
