So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Randomize
