so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
