dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
He keeps bees of course he's weird
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
