I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
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