i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
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