try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Randomize
