I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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