check it out our google latitudes are spooning
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
