started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
