Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Why is there bacon in the couch?
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
Randomize
