Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
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