do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
