He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
