You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
