Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Randomize
