i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
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