I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
You're a womanizer and a bitch.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
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