My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
