white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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