After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize