$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
