He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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