I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize