Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
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