Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Randomize
