its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Randomize
