My first STD was from a foam party
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
