I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
