I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Randomize
